Recovery begins with addressing your broken thinking. It is Stage Five in my Overcoming Setback Series housed on the website referenced below this post.
Broken thinking is reflected in your ideas, belief systems, behaviors, and ways of thinking about the world. If you believe the world is flawed, then you would not be the only person who had that thought. However, if you believe the world cannot change because of its flaws, then there should be some challenge to your belief system. This means that you do not believe you can change or that you are incapable of change.
There is this general consensus that people cannot change. In some ways I believe the status quo, but this only means that people cannot fathom change as a conscientious and sustainable undertaking. You must be consciously and conscientiously pursuing change, which includes changing your understanding about an issue, a problem, and the road to solutions.
Every problem has a solution. If a person has not changed, it is because the person does not desire the solution to the problem. The person has rejected either an obvious solution or a solution that takes time to develop. Regardless, every problem has a solution, and change begins when you understand the role of solutions.
For example, there are solutions to the problems inherent in marriage, even if you desire to exit a marriage using cheating as a strategy. This means that it is not always the marriage that is the problem. It is your attitude about the marriage. That is the root. You believe that exit is an option, and you will use whatever method afforded you or one you create to make that exit happen.
An alternative strategy would be just to explore the emotional issues you have with marriage, with yourself, and with your partner. There is something going on emotionally with the marriage that is disregarding the logic of the issue. The purpose must be supersede emotions.
The purpose of marriage is not to get married and have someone take care of you, have sex, and split all the bills. The purpose of marriage is to become one, act as one, make decisions as one, and continue to grow as one. When you stop being unified as one, then you have the process of dissolving the marriage, which requires you to transition into two. But if you transition into two, you were already of that mindset from the beginning. That is a problem that needs a solution.
If you fail a course or a test, you don’t say, “I can’t complete this course. It’s too hard. Therefore, I’m not going to retake it.” No, you learn how to study differently, take notes, get tutoring, and practice as much as you can until you pass the tests, the assignments, and then eventually the course. You cannot graduate or move forward to the next course if you do not pass the current course.
Otherwise, if you remain in that failure, then you remain in setback, and the only way out of setback is through instruction. Someone or something (i.e., book) has to come along and extend a hand for you to work through setback. You can pass the course.
Recovery, thus, is not optional, or it should not be optional. It is necessary if you desire to do anything beyond your setback, beyond your broken thinking. The goal of analysis in English and composition courses is to separate the content into parts and then address and analyze each part.
Therefore, if there is any area of your life, i.e., the totality of the assignment, that you need to address, take your life, break it down into parts (i.e., emotions, mentality, finances, spirituality, faith) and analyze each part.
The best way to begin the process of addressing broken thinking is to consider one aspect of your life and conduct a SWOT analysis: strengths, weaknesses, opportunities, and threats. Although SWOT is specific to business, I believe it can be useful as a life recovery objective. Consider these questions:
- What are my strengths?
- What are my weaknesses?
- What are my opportunities?
- What are my threats?
Take a category and add it to the questions as in, “What are my financial strengths?” Then take it from there by providing answers.
There is no such thing as an unsolved problem. There is only the lack of patience towards solving the problem. There is also the lack of follow through to get to the root and answer of the problem. Recover from your broken thinking about problem-solving because your very life depends on it.
Your feedback is appreciated.